


Be watchful of young men in their velvet prime

by Daffadowndilly



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Episode: s03e12 Plato's Stepchildren, Love Confessions, M/M, Space Husbands, and i love him so screw you, he's perfect, i may have overdone quite a few things in this actually it's totally unpolished so, it's not my fault ok i can hear his voice in my head, k/s - Freeform, sorry for the spot of shatnerese, soz as we used to say, spirk, well on their way to the husband part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:07:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24124891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daffadowndilly/pseuds/Daffadowndilly
Summary: Sometime shortly after the Plato's Children episode, Jim has been contemplating it and is coming to ask for Spock's opinion, as he always does. This song makes me go crazy every time. Like most poems, there are many thought paths it can take you on, this is an examination of one of them.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Spock
Comments: 5
Kudos: 57





	Be watchful of young men in their velvet prime

“They forced you to sing, that much I know, but the words -- the words, Spock, were they yours?”

“In a manner of speaking.”

“Please explain.”

“If an individual is forced to express anything in poetic form, the underlying thoughts or sentiments are likely to be somewhat… mangled.”

“...Mangled?”

“For lack of a better word, yes. When constructing poem, a poet makes deliberate decisions about form, metaphor, word choice, and so on. Each choice has a substantial impact on the tone and even meaning of the resulting piece. I did not make any of these choices. Instead, Parmen reached into my mind and drew my thoughts out of my mouth in the form of that song. Poetry is a language, Captain, and the words of the song were like the results one might expect if my thoughts were being processed through a substandard translation device. ‘Mangled’, as it were.”

“I… see. So the words were not wholly yours but the ideas in them were. Is there really a significant difference between the two things?”

“I merely mean to explain why there is some discrepancy between what was _expressed_ in the _words_ of the poem, and the _ideas_ from which they came.” Spock’s characteristically gentle emphases made Kirk smile a little in spite of himself.

“Yes, I understand,” said Kirk, “Then do you mind if I ask for a more… direct translation?”

Spock seemed to hesitate, but his expression was quite blank, “of course, Captain.”

It was Kirk’s turn to pause. “I suppose we should just start at the beginning then, eh?” Spock did not object. “... well the first part, about ‘take care young ladies,’ did it arise from the moment?”

“Indeed.”

“So it was directed at Uhura and Nurse Chapel.”

“It was not directed ‘ _at’_ anyone. It was a forced vocalization of half-formed thoughts.” He must have noticed Jim’s expression, as he continued on without further encouragement, “it arose from my concern for their safety, yes. My first concern being for there... Physical safety and dignity, my second being for Miss chapels emotional. I was painfully aware that she especially would suffer in the aftermath of forced closeness at Parmen's hands."

" so the first verse was about what was happening in the moment. Then, you and I were the men they should be watchful of?" Spock had a stiff look on his face which Jim sympathized with (the whole ordeal had made him feel powerless and… gross) but it had clearly made Spock feel like some kind of monster. From the incident with the tap-dancing, to the crushing of the candlestick in a failed attempt to control those emotions that Vulcans held most sinful -- rage, malice, hate -- to the forced demonstrations of emotion, to that horrible moment crouching next to their female crewmen, the whole episode had been emotionally and psychologically trying for Mr. Spock.

Trying to remember everything that he'd been mulling over since first hearing the song Jim spoke again more slowly, " with smiling words and tender touch…" he watched the Vulcans face closely as he spoke, " Spock, that's doesn't seem--" there was a silence in which Spock's face gave nothing away.

"That is not a question, Captain."

Jim sighed. "Fine. Is that also about the situation with Parmen and the others?"

"No, it was not." The shortness of the answer told Jim that they were fast approaching whatever it was that had Spock acting so cagey.

"Why?"

"Thoughts are never still, the mind is always in motion."

Cagey, indeed. They weren't going to get anywhere like that. Spock was shutting down.

"How about I tell you what I can work out and you just react to it, then? Tell me if I'm right, correct me if I'm wrong?" A pause. An inclination of the head. Jim inclined his head in response, "so your thoughts have flowed on, but they're still connected, the metaphor is the same and the tone hasn't really shifted that much. 

The second verse it's… it struck me as very sad. It felt like a memory. It isn't only fear of what may be, but also grief for what has been." Jim's voice, which had been thoughtful, as though he were trying to solve a puzzle, grew gentle, "is it more" he hesitated, "personal? Than the first?"

Spock's expression was nearly the picture of blank indifference but, to Jim's practice eyes, looked almost afraid.

  
  


_With smiling words and tender touch,_ these words seemed to Jim like something deeply personal to Spock; they rang strangely true as he sung them. Any listener, Jim thought, must have sensed the depth of them. He was stuck on them. He felt their depth but couldn’t seem to reach them.

No one touched Spock. Physical contact between crew members and the Vulcan was notably limited. He hadn’t any love affairs -- on or off the ship -- that Jim was aware of. Nurse Chapel was the only person on board that Kirk knew of whom had dared to approach Mr. Spock in a romantic capacity. She didn’t, however, seem to fit the bill here. 

_With smiling words_. Uhura occasionally smiled and teased and sang. Still, the “tender touch” was absent. She did not shun from touching Spock like most of the crew seemed to, but she couldn’t really be described as “tender” towards Spock.

  
  


“Do I ask so much of you, Spock?”

“In a sense, Captain.”

“And is my heart really so little?” Jim had not meant to say this aloud. He was a verbal person, by nature, and had a habit of monologuing and thinking aloud. Having involuntarily slipped into thinking out loud, he looked up sharply, in fear and embarrassment, hoping to catch Spock’s reaction.

“I-- I confess, Jim, I was not aware that the organ had ever been offered.”

A long silence followed these words. Dumbfounded, Jim stared. Spock stared back unblinkingly. “Then what-” He drew a deep breath in, staggering a little as though he'd bee struck. 

Spock instinctively reached out to steady Jim. The touch of his hand on Jim’s arm sparked the usual response, a horrible, aching yearning mixing with warmth in his chest, expanding out like a giant cloud of confusing emotion, threatening to burst out of him.

“How is it, Mister Spock,” Jim began again, regaining his footing and pushing past the warring feelings in his chest, “that you could have been unaware that I. That. Spock, you’re an observant man. You’re a touch-telepath. You’ve been inside my head! That instance with the cowboy illusions, for starters. And many times after that! How could you possibly have failed to divine my… _feelings_ for you?”

Spock seemed to struggle to find his voice for a moment, his hand still resting under Jim’s elbow. Finally, he spoke, “Jim, I have always greatly respected your privacy and have never invaded your mind beyond what was agreed upon before a bond was formed. In addition, you are a generally warm and affectionate man. I have never touched your mind without being somewhat overwhelmed by the loving tenderness that permeates your entire mindscape. It is possible that this may have contributed to my being insensitive to any specific amorous feelings that may have been directed at my person.” He speech and attitude was still so frusteratingly guarded.

“I think we may as well give up with the _may-have_ s.” Jim said, something akin to defeat in his voice, “it’s a bit late to pass any of this conversation off as hypothetical.”

“Forgive me, it is an old habit.”

“Hypothetical language in general, or in regards to me specifically?”

“In regards to your possible regard for me.”

Jim could feel the disbelief on his face, “To be honest Spock, I am stunned. I can hardly believe that you were so unaware of my, uh, interest in you.”

“Your _interest_ was never in question. Nor was some amount of affection: you have been fairly demonstrative in this regard for quite some time. Extremely demonstrative, by Vulcan standards.”

“Then… what? Was the confusion?”

“Humans, and even Vulcans, have incredibly complex social relationships. It is possible for interest or attraction to coincide with friendship without amorous feelings developing.”

“I see.” He could hear the horror in his own voice.

“Jim?”

“You thought I wanted to be friends-with-benefits or something? Is that what all the ‘cold morning light’ was about?”

“It would seem to be your usual modus operandi.” That stung a little. Spock seemed to sense this and added, “as far as I understand human social customs, there is nothing shameful in this. It simply was not an option for us. Not for me.”

“Modus operandi. M.O. Generally a description used for serial killers.” Jim said, thoughts a little scattered.

“And it would have killed me, Jim.”

“Killed you?”

“That is the human expression, is it not? I believe it is commonly used to describe potential emotional devastation?”

“I- yes. We do say that.” Why did their conversations always get so sidetracked?

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for the read!  
> It is possible I'll do another chapter sometime, but not particularly likely.  
> Please feel free to comment, I live for st discussions so if you have any thoughts about the song or a different take on it, I'd love to hear about it! Or if you have thoughts about the episode or if you just enjoyed the fic


End file.
